Birthday Girl

Ringing in my true New Year

I’ve never been a big New Year’s Eve or Day person. There’s a lot of pressure to get real, real drunk and then wake up to a laundry list of mostly empty promises largely driven by industries looking to make a buck by hammering you with messages that you are less than and not good enough as is. Yeah, hard pass on all of that.

My New Year’s Day has always been my birthday, which is today, July 29. And this year, the universe has also delivered a full moon on the same day – a Buck Moon in Aquarius to be exact – talk about the ultimate birthday gift. This particular moon arrives on what is said to be one of the most cosmically concentrated days of the entire year. It’s a full moon rooted in pivotal change, asking us to release beliefs, habits, stories, and patterns that have been taking up space in our lives, and step into a bolder, truer version of ourselves to receive what’s been waiting for us. Throw in that 2026 was also declared as a stellar year for Leos in particular and my woo-woo brain is basically levitating today.

Everyone always asks how you’re going to spend your day, which got me thinking about previous celebrations. One of my favorite birthday parties came early on, my tenth to be exact, which fell two days after the release of the film “Purple Rain.” My bedroom was predominately purple at the time, as were my glasses, so I was already on brand. The soundtrack had come out a month earlier, though I didn’t actually own it at first, and therefore mostly lived in what was played on the radio as early singles, like “When Doves Cry” and “I Would Die 4 U.”

I asked my parents for a party that would culminate in taking me and my friends (and my older brother) to a screening of the film. Because you know, R-rated is 100% appropriate for a 10-year-old, but then again, I’d also seen “48 Hours” with Nick Nolte and Eddie Murphy in the theaters with my parents when I was in third grade. Gen X baby! We were raised differently, ‘kay?

That said, once I actually saw the movie, that opened up a LOT of questions for me. Such as, “Who exactly was Nikki, and what was she doing with a magazine?”

ANYHOO, back to my birthday being my true New Year’s Day. One tradition I do hold from the universal January 1 date is reflecting where I’ve been and where I’m headed.

My gratitude list is long, and at the top is Gilda Radner. At this time last year, she was very, very ill, and we had no idea what the cause was, with the possibilities getting about as bleak as it could get. After multiple tests and the blessing of an amazing vet, we discovered she had an immune condition. Lifelong, but not immediately life-threatening. I know I don’t get her forever. But I get her right now, thriving, and I’m taking it – she’s improved greatly over the past year and is truly living her best life. She loves having two dog brothers, she is obsessed with my partner, and she LOVES being outside in our backyard, even when it’s far too hot for her to do so.

She also had her first real grown-up groomer’s appointment about a week and a half ago. When we lived in Portland, her terrier-forward coat stayed pretty consistent. She had baths and brushings and nail trims, but never had been to the beauty parlor - never needed it. When we moved to the Las Vegas area, her coat grew like CRAZY and the tips became very white. She also packed on some lbs due to medication, and speaking of Nick Nolte, she was really starting to look like his mug shot.

The boys had been to regular groomer appointments, but not Gilda. I found a new mobile groomer (so I could helicopter parent) with five-star reviews, and they knocked it out of the park. The before and after for Gilda in particular has brought me endless laughter over the past few weeks… she looks like she went to rehab. And/or that she went to Kris Jenner’s person and had work done.

Tied with Gilda at the top of my gratitude list is my partner, who shows up for me over and over and over again, emotionally, mentally, physically, all of the above, in ways no one ever has in my life. He is also responsible for me finally taking the leap and putting 100% of my time and focus into my own creative endeavors, including writing and producing. No day job holding the door open behind me. I don’t know that I would have cut that perceived safety cord completely had he not encouraged me to do so.

And he shows up not just for the smooth sailing, but the really tough shit too, including being hands-on during a family health crisis in May. Last year, he’d also built me a raised garden bed but I hadn’t put it to use until this year, and if you think the way my basil is thriving is too on-the-nose a metaphor for the way we continue to grow together… well, so be it.

Here’s a few other key takeaways from the past year, in no particular order:

State your boundaries. Then state them again. And again. It won’t be a one and done. This is territory that bears repeating. Turns out it’s a critical part of how you hold said boundaries, especially when someone else’s whole dynamic with you depended on you never having them. The pushback will be hard and it will be constant. Hold your ground anyway.

On a related note, not everyone gets your time. Not everyone gets access to you. It’s your greatest currency and should be spent more wisely than whatever dollar bills you have in the bank.

Retire the people pleaser. It won’t happen overnight, but it becomes easier if you practice pausing to ask yourself, “Am I doing ____ because it’s really what’s in MY best interest?” It’s not selfish to ask that question. It’s self-love. Also, this may be breaking news to some, but turns out “No” is a complete sentence. I did not know this at nine. Or 29. Or possibly even 49. But I know it now.

That all said, feel your feelings. I’m ALL for it. Let them move through you. But ride out the reaction before you act on it, and be selective about who’s in the room while you do so. The version of you on the other side of that ride is where the response lives, and in my experience, that will serve you far, far better as a foundation for making choices vs. the emotionally-fueled reaction state.

And on the choices front? If it’s not a hell yeah, it’s a hell no. Your gut knows. It always has. Trust it.

In the “looking ahead” department, as woo woo as I am, it turns out I don’t have a reliable crystal ball – not yet (birthday gifts accepted year round, hint hint). But there IS a new partnership in the works related to my scripted series. Keeping details close to the vest for now, but let’s just say the possibilities are very real and extremely exciting.

What I can tell you is this: name your dreams out loud and be very specific with what you want. You’ll be blown away at how powerful this can be when it comes to making them true.

Come to think of it, that sounds like the perfect guiding force for the year to come.

XO,
SG

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